Anxiety, Insecurity, Uncategorized, Writing

January 31, 2019

I have been told my entire life that I need thicker skin. At 23, when I believe I have developed it, it seems as if I revert back to the girl who just needs thicker skin.

Thicker skin. People shout this advice whenever they can grasp my fears in the palm of their hands, as if I can just exfoliate this thin layer that engulfs me, shedding years of insecurity in a days time. Thicker skin. 

An illusion that I have been chasing my entire life. Just when I think I have grasped the concept, it slips through my hands like a wet bar of soap, resulting in me chasing it frantically around the slippery shower I call life. I spend days dragging around my own self critics because I am both the recipient and sender of these internal wounds….. Thicker skin.

Yet, somehow I picked a life where every lip curl, eye roll, bad hair day, and late night is quietly observed by 100+ eyes a day. I guess I should just grow thicker skin. 

6 thoughts on “January 31, 2019”

  1. Thick skin is fine for teaching a subject. A thinner skin better for teaching people, who might need to connect with you as well as what you want to explore with them; certainly thin enough for you to see into your own heart when teaching poetry, whether someone else’s verse or what you want to draw out of them.

    Liked by 1 person

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